Jerry Lewis spends most of the movie masquerading as an eleven year old. He’s being pursued by a killer and diamond thief played by Raymond Burr. He trails him to a school for girls where Dean Martin is a teacher. Of course any storyline takes a back seat to sight gags, slapstick and mayhem as Dean and Jerry do their thing. Jerry’s character wears thin after a while but it does have a fun factor.
In an L.A. hotel a crook named Noonan (Raymond Burr) kills a man and makes off with a huge diamond. As the cops show up he on purpose bumps into Bob Miles (Dean Martin). He’s a teacher at a girl’s school in Oregon and is trying to get back into the army. Noonan slips the diamond into Bob’s jacket pocket.
The cops search Noonan and have to let him go. In the barbershop run by Francois (Hans Conried) is sweeper Wilbur Hoolick (Jerry Lewis). He badly wants to be a barber. Just to have some fun with Francois, Wilbur disguises himself as an old man complete with fake gray hair and a mustache. Francois catches on real fast and then heads off for lunch.,
Bob comes in for a haircut and Wilbur has a fake goatee and using a fake French accent calls himself Francois. The usual mayhem ensues. Noonan sneaks in a takes the diamond from Bob’s jacket and slips it into Wilbur’s back pocket. He then hires him to goto his wife’s place and give her a head massage. Then he calls his wife and tells her to search him when he comes over.
At the apartment she tries everything to get the diamond. Finally she grabs it..she thinks.. after Noonan comes in and threatens Wilbur who eventually runs out. Instead of the diamond they end up with a wad of bubble gum.
Wilbur runs to the train station and wants to get a ticket to his hometown of Blitzen,Washington. Wilbur doesn’t have enough for the ticket. Behind him is a tall twelve year old wearing a sailor suit who’s mother (Nancy Kulp) gets him a half fare ticket. Wilbur tricks him and gets the sailor suit. Bob is saying goodbye to girlfriend Nancy Collins (Diana Lynn). A passenger misunderstands as Wilbur whines and forces Bob to buy him a ticket.
On the train Noonan spots Wilbur’s fake goatee in his suitcase and realizes the little boy sitting next to him is Wilbur. Wilbur runs away and ends up in Nancy’s compartment. She’s convinced he’s just eleven and comforts him during a thunderstorm. Wilbur stays the night in the lower berth.
The next morning at the girl’s school Bob hears that the train is stuck and drives off to get Nancy. Gretchen (Nina Foch) is the daughter of the head mistress and is jealous of Nancy and goes with him. On the train Gretchen discovers Wilbur in Nancy’s compartment. She hurries back to the school and tells the board about her discovery in hopes that Nancy will be fired. Wilbur’s act convinces the board that everything is proper.
Wilbur is ready to leave but spots Noonan hanging around. He ends up staying with Gretchen’s twelve year old brother Mike. He goes through Wilbur’s suitcase and finds a straight razor. Wilbur convinces him to keep his secret. Mike wants to be a geologist and wants to examine the big rock he found in Wilbur’s clothes.
Student Skeets (Mitzi McCall) is one of the girls assigned to showing Wilbur around. She’s smitten with him. He puts a lip lock on her when he sees Noonan. Nancy and Bob catch the action and Nancy decides to have a talk with him about girls. Bob gets suspicious when he catches Wilbur putting a lip lock on Nancy.
Bob is told there are two men who want to see him. They’re cops from the hotel. They tell him all about who Wilbur really is and want him to keep an eye on him. They inform him that Noonan is chasing him and they want him to keep quiet about Wilbur’s masquerade. That doesn’t stop him from being jealous about Nancy.
Thanks to Mike steaming open a letter he finds out that Gretchen has used her friendship with an officer’s daughter to keep Bob from going back into the army.Wilbur sees a way to get rid of his rival for Nancy and makes a phone call disguising his voice.
There’s a lot more gags to come including Wilbur hiding out in Nancy’s apartment. She doesn’t know it but Bob is convinced of it. Later it’s the big school dance.
The whole thing ends with a chase scene. Instead of cars this one is done with boats. It’s very well done and contains a lot of stunts and is great to watch.
Overall the movie is entertaining if a bit drawn out but it’s exactly what you’d expect from Martin and Lewis and on that basis is one to watch.
Jerry convinces Dean he’s just eleven years old