Hey Kids!!!! Adults Only!!!!!
A classic of its kind. Movies like this were shown at what were called Art Houses. Local D.A.’s looking for something to do would on occasion have these places raided. The movies featured lots of R rated nudity and tons of lame jokes. This one has minimal dialogue and features sketches where our hero dreams that he’s famous people in history. The movie is narrated by Larry Burrell. The girls are all from burlesque.
Dr.Finster (Larry Burrell) tries to answer the question,”Has woman taken over the modern world?” Finster is never on camera as he doesn’t want anyone to see him. On screen are Mr. and Mrs.X (Hank Henry and Valkyra). Henry is henpecked. He escapes by reading history, watching westerns and talking to his goldfish. Mr.X goes to a bar. He starts to have his fantasies.
He dreams he’s Marc Antony trying to make it with Cleopatra. She eventually shows him her asp with tragic results. Roman soldiers are breaking though the door. He escapes by pretending to be a snake charmer.
Next he’s Napolean. He’s trying to get it on with Josephine. Her son, Little Eugene (Little Jack Little) is in the way and she has to go to a PTA meeting. Five years later they’re married but Eugene rules the roost.
Now he’s Captain John Smith. He runs into John Rolfe but his attention is drawn to skinny dipping Indian maidens. He’s captured and the chief wants him executed. Pocahontas begs for his life and tells daddy they’re getting married. But coming into their tent…John Rolfe.
Now he dreams he’s Samson. Delilah wants to cut his hair. She finally hits him over the head with a vase and knocks him out. Goodbye hair. Now he’s chained to a couple pillars while in front of him Delilah is fooling around with two guys. Here comes her spritzer girl. She’s knitted a wig for Samson. Things still don’t work out.
In the lamest of the sketches he’s Ferdinand The Fat who is married to Lucretia Borgia. She drops some love vitamins into his drink. Things still go wrong.
Into the bar walks a Reubenesque blonde wearing a leopard print dress. That leads to…..
The last sketch. He’s a cave man. His wife rules. She shows him a drawing of a dinosaur and tells him to go get one. Spear in hand he heads out. He comes to a pool filled with skinny dipping cave girls. This sketch focuses more on the girls that any other. He spots a dinosaur. He’s not exactly a mighty hunter. He goes back and fools around with the girls. Then his wife shows up.
None of his dreams work out and he heads for home where a surprise awaits.
The movie is worth seeing because it is a guilty pleasure for anyone who looks for older movies with corn instead of porn but with enough nudity to make you feel like an awkward thirteen year old boy who wants to know why being grown up can be fun. The jokes are from beginning to end and some are actually clever.
The Little Jack Little in the movie is not the same one who is a song writer and singer.
Hank was in several big movies including “Oceans 11” and “Robin And The Seven Hoods.”